I recently took my 2 month old to the doctor for a check up. When the subject of vaccinations came up, I simply said we are not getting any at this time. I saw the confusion in the medical assistant’s eyes, but she covered it nicely and simply said she would let the Nurse Practitioner (NP) know. As I waited for her to come in, I wondered what type of approach the NP would take.
Once the formalities were over, she cut to the chase. “Dr. M requires her patients to have their vaccines. Have you spoken with her about this?”
WHAT??? I could feel my blood starting to simmer, and I counted to 10 before I spoke. “No, I have not spoken with her, but this the decision my husband and I have made for our baby. We are delaying all vaccines until we are comfortable.”
The NP then tried to convince me about the benefits, and how they would work with me, even if I want to do one at a time. I thanked her for the information and smiled.
However, the entire time I was getting more and more frustrated. The longer she talked, the more I wanted to scream at her – “You are not the boss of me!” (But, I of course didn’t – my older 2 were in the room! Ha!) I understand that medical professionals have a job to do, and I appreciate their knowledge. However, when it comes to the ultimate decision on what will and will not go into my children’s bodies, I am the ultimate decision maker (along with Abel). Many times I feel that medical professionals try to bully patients into their way of thinking. Especially on the topic of vaccines. But I am not going to be bullied into a different way of thinking to make them happy!
I bit my tongue to keep from defending my choice. Why? Because I should not have to defend my choice ! I am not making this decision lightly, I am researching, reading and praying about this. I am not saying no to vaccinations solely on the premise that I am scared of Autism. I am saying no because I simply want to make the Best. Decision. Possible. End of story!
As I left the doctor that morning, I felt a slight victory. I did not cave in when I felt the NP disapprove of my choice, I did not get emotional and cry ( a big plus considering all the post pregnancy hormones that are still taking over my body!) and I said what I felt needed to be said; no more, no less. Because in the end, these are my blessings to take care of, protect and nurture. And I will do my best to make God directed decisions at every chance I can. Because my kids are worth it.